Tamsen on the slumps of college

College is an important acquisition in life.  Employers like to see that job candidates have a degree, even if they do not care in which subject that degree is.  College years are years when you really find what you’re made of.  Hopefully.  Are you able to weather the tides of deadlines, personal drama, stress, illness, and possibly apathetic professors? Do you crumble to the persistence of peers to waste time and money and brain cells on binge drinking and eating? Or do you discover your favorite thing in the whole world? Do you meet that one person on whom you can rely for the rest of your life? Will your friends change, stay the same, become new people? A lot happens in college.

My musings today are about the inevitable point in college when you stop caring enough about the school aspect of college.  When you’d rather be working and gaining money instead of paying thousands of dollars for fees, both understanding and baffling.

I’ve hit that point.  I’ve been trying to complete a take-home mid-term essay for the last hour or so.  I have maybe… a paragraph complete.  It isn’t that the topic is uninteresting.  It isn’t that I’ve lost all my brain power.  I’ve simply moved past the point where I care about essays.  I love to write, but I have written so many essays (something I’ve never been terribly fond of to begin with) I just don’t care to write another.  I’m tired of citing sources in text then adding a bibliography at the end.  I’m tired of spewing information instead of writing creatively.  I’m tired of feeling like a fool for falling asleep in class, and coming to just in time to see the professor staring right at me.

I think I’d prefer to just hunker down in a bakery and make sweet things that bring smiles to people’s faces.  I’d rather start paying off student loans than contemplate how much more money that I don’t possess I have to spend.

On the bright side, I apply for graduation before the start of my final semester.  Which means, for my last semester I can worry even less than I already do about grades.  So, really, I just need to get going and write my take-home essay.  Read sources for my three research papers.  And recognize that I am really close to being done.  Really close.  If I can just make it through my current semester, I’m pretty much home free.  There is every possibility that next semester will be a breeze: fewer classes, likely only one paper instead of three or four, a bookbinding class, and less pressure to kill my brain and nerves over the completion of essays.  Excellent.

2 thoughts on “Tamsen on the slumps of college

  1. Yes! You are almost done. This is the true test to see what you are made of. If you can endure this last bit, you can endure almost anything. I will tell you, I never hit that point where college lost its intrigue for me. I always LOVED it! Of course I had a scholarship that last two years, so that helped. And I had my sugar Daddy to support me so I didn’t have to work at all the last year. Heaven, pure heaven. I hope your next semester gives you the relief you need.

  2. I’ve been there. Right where you’re at now. You’ll be really glad when you’re graduated. You’ll be really glad you did it. You’ll have a sense of accomplishment that will stay with you the rest of your life. (Among all of the other accomplishments you make.) 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s